Countless people, well, I guess I could count them…have asked why I have not been writing. Well, I have been writing. Just nothing anyone would want to read. However, to everyone’s relief, after turning in a far too long paper on the problems associated with health care and my half ass answer for them..I am officially back.
So, what anyone concerned enough to read this is wondering…friend, foe or stalker-here is what’s new.
Surgery last Monday went well. Just like those “sent from mom” Tupperware containers in your freezer that you’re not “quite” sure about; my cervix was frozen, defrosted, frozen and thawed during the most painful procedure that I have had yet. I am most proud that I didn’t cry. I did however have 3 pain pills, a klonopin and the remainder of my week-old fingernails. I spent 3 days on my sofa/chaise bed I created in the living room watching 52 inches of estrogen filled movies with my girlfriends eating every comfort food available complete with sundaes, beef and cheese and lucky charms. What the pain pills and heating pad couldn’t handle, the Michelob and Crown did. On a positive note, I have felt what childbirth contractions feel like, actually experience my uterus contracting…and I am convinced that my pain threshold had stretched further than ever before and I could feasibly deliver a child with no epidural. On the same note, there is no way in hell I plan to.
My classes are taking a little more of my “free” time than I expected and I have had projects, papers and homework so I am feeling teen-ish again.
Bungy may or may not be a girl. I am crushed. I have googled, youtubed and even bought a book with a “how to sex a rabbit” chapter and I still cannot tell. When they say it is tricky-they are not exaggerating. I am taking her/him…it to the vet on the 28th for a checkup, aging test so I know when to spay/neuter the poor baby, and finally find out if I should be buying pearls or argyle sweaters for Christmas.
Work is not worth writing about. I apparently am taking on some new projects but I’m not sure of any details and have no concrete idea of what I will actually be doing. So I am not going to speculate just to clarify later.
I am animal sitting this weekend-One dog, one cat, a saltwater aquarium, a fresh water aquarium, two doves and a goldfish pond. I initially thought to myself that how ridiculous it is for one person to have such an extensive petting zoo and then I realized this guy only has two more exhibits than I do. I don’t think it would be too much of a stretch to find me knitting on the front porch before Halloween…I’m just saying.
I plan a girl’s blowout every Halloween, parties and costumes but this year, I want to sit at home and pass out candy to the little hellions in the neighborhood. I’m feeling old.
The wing of the airplane on my Tiffany’s bracelet is bent and that pisses me off. How can you charge hundreds for tiny charms that bend and break? On second thought, obsessed women as myself are how they charge that much-scratch the “pisses me off.”
I saw Sorority Row last night, save your money, time and energy required to see this movie. I can never get that hour and fifteen minutes back.
I am buying a powerball ticket today. I don’t know how to, where to go or even how much they are, but I am willing to learn for a chance at 120 million dollars.
Finally, I would like to hit pause on life for a few days. If someone has that figured out-sell me the secret.
